Wonder what Miera, Charlie, Jay and Stella are doing right now???

Hey there...I know what you're thinking, Miera. I'm supposed to be studying for my freaking driving license test, instead I'm blogging. I know, lazy little me. I swear right after lunch I am going to sit down and study. I promise.

I don't know what my mum meant when she said that *There is some -hikmah- behind getting that results for your SPM*. To me, it sounds like I deserved it to get those results that a lot of people never expected to hear from me. But she says it like *If you didn't get that results, your chances of going into UIAM is very slim*...I think that if my results were better, I'd apply for some other scholarships from some private universities or something like that. I won't even go to UIAM. My mum makes it sound like my results were so bad, and she's looking on that as a blessing so that we wouldn't have to spend so much money on my education. You may think I'm trying to imply that she's stingy. Not really. Everytime I bring up the issue of buying some decent T-shirts, she says that I have enough T-shirts and that I don't need it. My T-shirts are like 6-7 years old already. I need more than that! I don't know why it's so wrong for her to say that. To me, it's like adding salt to the wound. Ouch. It's not enough my results were so bad, she makes it sound it's a good thing I didn't get better. For someone like me, I deserve more than what I got. I'd probably taken up some scholarship offered by some company if I had better results. Not waste some 6-7-8 months waiting for my UIAM application to be approved. That is if I actually get it. So frustrating to hear your own flesh and blood to say that.

Was actually thinking something one morning. You know the girl who got 17A1s for SPM? That Nur Amalina? Yeah...I mean I read somewhere that she was offered the Bank Negara scholarship along with the other top-scorers. I mean, why would a bank offer a girl like her who wants to be a gynaecologist and study in Oxford a scholarship to do some banking crap? Unless Bank Negara is planning to open an O & G clinic there and she plans to work there? Or open a maternity ward there or something like that? I mean the other girl Anushree who scored 14A1s, it's wise for them to offer her that scholarship since she wants to be an economist or something (correct me if I'm wrong). The other guy, I'm not sure what he wants to do since he's being overshadowed by these two girls. But to offer that Nur Amalina a scholarship? That's is wrong to me. She's depriving of another hopeful candidate of getting that scholarship. And she gets to do this Stabilo pencil ad. It's like saying that the pencil holds the key to her successes. Not her. I mean, it's like saying she depended on the pencil to do well. Not because the countless hours and effort she pumped in to get that results. Now I know that pencils hold the answer to everything in the exams, not us. Damn, no wonder I got such crappy results! This was a joint effort by me and Miera. About the possibilities my child persuading me to buy the pencil for him.

Johan: Mak, please buy me that pencil that the girl who scored 17A1 in her SPM used for her exams. Please.
Me: Johan, she didn't use the pencil to be smart. She studied hard and put in a lot of effort to get good results. I'll buy you a different pencil, ok?
Johan: Mak, I don't want a different pencil. I want that pencil. This one.
Me: Johan, don't believe everything you see in the television. It only makes kids like you get swayed. Listen to me, I know what's best for you. I'm your mother. Not that girl. This pencil is good.
Johan: No, mak! You don't love me. You don't want me to be smart. You want me to be stupid!
Me: No, Johan. I only want what's best for you. I'm your mother. Why would I want you to be stupid. I'd like you to be smart. In fact, smarter than me. All I'm saying is that a pencil won't determine how well you do in your exams. It's the effort, prayers and faith you put in when you study that matter. Nothing else. I'll buy you ice-cream, ok?
Johan: Really mak?
Me: Of course, sayang. Anything for you. You are after all, my pride and joy. My smart, sweet and wonderful son.
Johan: Thank you, mak. I'm sorry bout the pencil anyway. I believe you now.
Me: Good boy!
Johan: So clever-lah mak!

Hahaha...I'm really losing my marbles. How can I think of all these things right now? Oh well, since I'm so free right now, that's when my head starts to wonder. Hehehe...me. Anyway, toodles for now! Bye...and au revoir!