I'm in the mood...

I'm in the mood...

for ranting, romancing, and sleeping all night tonight.

RANTING:

Okay, so there's another 5 days till I hit the big 18. So what? I just feel sad I'm getting older and sadly, not wiser as I anticipated. I still feel like the 4 year old girl I know is STILL in me. The one who always gets herself into unwanted troubles and not having an ounce of sorry after getting into unnecessary consequences later on. The one who refused to leave something that caught her eye at the shop she visited, making sure that her parents buy her THAT particular thing and leave the shop with a smile of victory. The girl who used to get bruises all over the body, and not cry a bit. The girl everybody assumed was innocent but reckless all in one go, because of her tender age. The girl who would talk and talk and talk like there's no tomorrow, hence the nickname *Talkative Brat*. The girl who would smile when she wears jeans and cringe when seen in dresses/skirts and in anything in the shade of pink. Yes, that girl is still in there somewhere only I know. I wish I could go back to be that 4 year old girl and stay 4 forever. I want to be 4 forever so that I don't have to deal with whatever I have to deal with later on when I get older. I don't want to know *What happens when I turn 12? 16? 21? 30? 45? 60???*. I don't want to know when we must fall in love, why there's lots of backbiting and backstabbing, why must I get married, why must I cook for my spouse, why must we have kids, why must we die(though it's part and parcel of life) ? I wish I could make a complete turnaround right now. I hate the way my life is going. It's seemingly looks as though it's getting more and more pathetic and lame. I wish I could stay 4 again and never grow up, like Peter Pan and stay in Neverland (Not Michael Jackson's place okay? Don't even go there!). *Sighs loudly*.

ROMANCING:

Been listening to Westlife's *Turnaround* album(yes, my romancing mood is finally kicking in, so just bear with my nonsensical attitude okay?). I think the most beautiful song on that album would be the wonderful remake of Mr. Big's *To Be With You*. It's amazingly beautiful since the song goes a little bit like this:

*When it's through, it's through,

Fate will twist the both of you,

So come on baby, come on over,

Let me be the one to show you...*

*I'm the one who wants to be with you,

Deep inside I hope you feel it too,

Waiting on the lines of greens and blues,

Just to be the next to be with you...*

*Why be alone when we can be together baby?

You can make my life worthwhile,

I can make you start to smile...*

I would very much like a guy to serenade me this song while strumming the guitar, just outside my house or somewhere equally romantic. It's such a poignant song for any one who wants to be loved and love someone in return. Erm...am I in love? I really wished I had someone to love and pour my affections on them, but I just can't seem to find the suitable one for me. I don't mind being old and alone, as I mentioned before. But it's even better if you have someone to share your love with when you're greying and wrinkled, and still can love you for the same person they met for the first time. Pathetic of me to think of the joys of being in love with someone, when I unceremoniously thought love wasn't for me. Mar, I'm not desperately seeking a potential/prospective boyfriend now! I just love listening to love songs right now, especially when you can no longer associate yourself with them and sob at the same time for the same insipid reason, or pick a theme love song for you and your significant other. The feeling is wonderful. I can be myself AGAIN.

-I don't have to follow you and end up just like one of them!-

SLEEPING:

Just feel so darn lazy to study, despite my mid-term exams are looming nearer too! Right now, I'm just completing my study skills journal. Actually I'm starting on the 1st week's journal! Procrastination is BAD! Kids, don't follow my footsteps. Better get back to work then.

And I think JM looks like a cat (don't know why though, but I just do!). Plus I think, Kavenesh's brother, Darshan has a striking resemblance with JM. In certain angles, he looks A LOT like JM. The boy's only 5! And yes, I noticed today that JM looks a wee bit like Frank Lampard, in certain angles anyway. Ignore my high level of psychoticness.

*Bluesy* out!